Here’s my “simple” solution for America’s raging marriage debate.

It isn’t unique, I know, but I think it would solve some of the major problems surrounding this issue. So, bear with me as you read. You may be surprised by my proposal.

As a matter of principle, the people need to rise up once and for all and kindly request that the US government remove itself from the marriage business, forever-after. My opinion, which is drawn from my understanding of the Bible, is that marriage was created by God in the book of Genesis. Don’t even try to argue with me about that point, because I will not listen to you under any circumstance. Because that is my belief, I vehemently disagree with any government on earth assuming it has the right or authority to define or redefine marriage. In fact, I don’t see how, Biblically, any government even has the right to oversee the institution of marriage.

In some ways, (if I understand correctly … very hard to verify), we have Luther, Calvin, and then the English Puritans to thank for the mess we are in concerning the marriage debate in America. On marriage, Luther is often quoted as having said marriage is “a worldly thing ... that belongs to the realm of government.” Hence our problem. Luther, if you can hear me, please disregard any nasty things I may be saying about you under my breath. Suffice it say, you were dead wrong. Dead wrong. Marriage belongs to the realm of religion.

Instead, I propose that the US government at all levels will forever be in charge of granting Civil Unions. Yep. CUs. All previous marriage licenses will be grandfathered in as CU Licenses. Civil Unions will show no respect to race, sex, religion or any such factor but shall only regard proper laws such as legal age as with other things like the consumption of alcohol, joining the military, etc. CUs can only be granted by approved officers of the law (just as in driver’s license, passports, etc).

The very word marriage will need to be deleted from government language and replaced with "Civil Union." As far as the government is concerned, terms such as husband, wife, and spouse will all be replaced with "civil partner."

Marriage will then become the sole domain of religion, as it was in Genesis. Each religious institution will be responsible and accountable to their own beliefs regarding marriage.

Think about, folks. This is a win-win for everyone. It allows the government to say "Marriage is a religious issue, an issue of 'the Church,' and none of our business, therefore we will get out of your business." Those who oppose same-sex unions win -- the government will no longer grant marriage licenses to anyone, and the issue will leave the political arena. It also allows the homosexual and heterosexual community to be afforded the exact same rights and privileges under the law, making the government no respecter of persons. Those who support same-sex unions also win, as the idea of government-endorsed marriages will also be taken from heterosexuals and they will now be granted the same exact status as homosexuals: civil unions as legal and binding contracts issued by the government.

Of course, homosexuals who also want to pursue a church-endorsed marriage will always be able to find a liberal congregation that is willing to do such a thing. Those who are looking for a “traditional,” Genesis-based marriage covenant will be able to find conservative congregations who only deal in that realm.

Problem solved. No more political discourse on the subject, ever again.

I’m eager to hear your thoughts. However, if you just want to flame me, I will ignore you. I may even delete you. I have that power. I run a benevolent dictatorship here.

Share on Google Plus

About Eric Wilbanks

Brand strategist. Wordsmith. Change architect. Training specialist. DiSC Certified. Family guy (hot wife and 4 cool kids). Love my Bible, guitars, baseball, and MMA.


  1. Replies
    1. :-) Thank you, Stephanie. You are too kind. Glad you enjoyed the post.

  2. Ditto! Thanks Eric for a well written, concise statement that echos what many of my family, friends and associates have been saying... and you did it without disparaging anyone on either side of the issue! Great job!

    1. Thanks, Steve! I appreciate your kind words. It's always a bit unnerving to post on such controversial issues. I'd be honored if you decide to share this post with those you think could be encouraged (or gently "stretched") by it.

  3. I find it interesting that the NC Legislature actually proposed that in one of the versions of the bill that now has become NC Amendment One.

    Here is the link to it on their website:

    1. That is VERY interesting, Kristy! I can't seem to make the link work from my phone, though. Is there any more information you can give me? I'll retry when I'm in front of my computer Thanks for reading!

  4. It proposed a "Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage belongs to the sole authority of the church, and no authority over marriage shall be recognized as valid by the State. This will end the practice of requiring a State license to marry." That version was replaced with the wording of our new Amendment 1.

  5. Right on, brother! In 1992, when Sarah and I got married, we intentionally scripted our wedding to leave out part of the ending that ministers normally use. Instead of saying, "By the powers vested in me by God and the state of (TN)…", our minister said, "By the powers vested in me by God, I now pronounce you, husband and wife." When we use the term, "same-sex marriage", we demean the sacred, God ordained covenant between a man and woman.

  6. I'm not sure I am 100% there with you on this, although I do like it. Having said that - it is brilliant. In fact, it is the simple obviousness of it that is so striking. well done my friend.

  7. Thanks for the kind comments, everyone. I realize this is a controversial topic. There are probably hundreds of folks who've read this that could have left some really nasty remarks, but I'm thankful for their kindness in restraint and I'm thankful for those of you who have posted such encouraging words. I wish we could move this conversation forward, but I'm fairly certain I'm not the one who will be able to make that happen (or even if I'd want to be were I able--my skin is probably not thick enough to stand up to the intense scrutiny that would surely follow). Nevertheless, feel free to continue sharing this post as often and as wide as you see fit. Maybe it will prove helpful in the long run...